Five!
Five years ago we were settling in for our first Thanksgiving with a tiny new human and marveling at all his adorable baby behavior. And now we're wrapping up another Thanksgiving, and I'm marveling at this great big boy -- who is, right now, hammering nails into a piece of wood with total competence -- who cannot possibly be five years old. Five! When did that happen?
I don't have a strong sense of Henry at age four. Starting school last year threw him into a tailspin indistinguishable from his threenager drama, which didn't subside until he was nearly four and a half, and then I was pretty wrapped up with newborn Heidi for the next few months. By the time we went to the cabin at 4.75, he already seemed very five-ish to me.
And five! It's awesome. He's still small enough to be cute and big enough to be a funny, helpful, caring little person. He really is the life of the household; when he's gone, it's a little too quiet and a little dreary. He's starting to take more notice of other people's moods and needs, not all the time (obviously), but a few occasions from this year stand out. When Karl had surgery early in the year, Henry was an awesome nursemaid, and when I was sick this weekend, he was very sensitive to letting me rest and asking how I was feeling. He also spontaneously thinks of his people and wants to do things for them. Grandpa Dave was the lucky recipient of a neon yellow shirt that Henry saw in a neighbor's give-away pile and saved for two months, just for him.
He adores Heidi and takes great care of her. His new favorite game is to carry her around, which absolutely delights her, but we had to have a talk about not leaving her on the coffee table. He and Ingrid alternately play wonderfully together or antagonize the sh*t out of each other.
He's an extrovert through and through. Carol once told me how she pegged her boys' dispositions: they'd pull the car into the driveway at the end of a family vacation and Eric would immediately leap out and run down the block to find friends; three companions for a week was too few. Karl would immediately go to his room and shut the door; three companions for a week was three too many. Henry goes to class with 25 kids all day, then we play at the playground for an hour and a half after school, and if he can't find any neighbor kids to play with when we get back home, he weeps until Karl gets back to play with him. It's a good thing Karl and I read this or parenting him would be baffling.
He likes novelty but not surprises. It doesn't go well if I try to change the plan or spring something on him at the last minute (a feeling I do understand very well). But he gets bored if we do the same activities over and over again.
He still freaks out about small things but is learning to check it. Ms. Bennett reports that he's even better about it at school because he doesn't want his friends to think he's a baby. All of his buddies are a year older than he is and will move up to the next classroom after this year, which makes me a little nervous about next year.
His ability to focus and work has improved enormously in the last year. He works really hard at karate and parkour, and apparently cranks on the movable alphabet and other work for hours at a time at school.
Just in the last two months, he figured out how to follow Lego kit instructions and can do them mostly independently. And it constantly amazes me how many things he can do. He ties his shoes. He opens his own FeverTree ginger beer. Yesterday he made us dessert. It only had three ingredients, but he learned it at a friend's house, he did it all himself without making a mess, and it tasted really good! That's apparently more independence than one can expect from many college students. And yet he still does not eat with a fork on a regular basis. You win some, you lose some.
We had a really fun party at Henry's happy place, the Parkour gym. This was the first time he wanted only his buddies at the party, i.e. not the children of my friends who I make him hang out with. Boooo. But he does have a really nice group of friends from school. I'm also a little touched that he has maintained his affection for Ravi, Cooper, and Wilton since he doesn't see those guys very often any more.
Of course, these are just my observations of Henry at this age. But he's also getting old enough to have meaningful opinions of his own. As he develops a complex internal life he may see himself differently, and he may change over time and surprise us both. I thought it might be fun to start recording what he thinks of himself and his world right now. So I cribbed some interview questions from another blogger:
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| Thanksgiving 2010 |
I don't have a strong sense of Henry at age four. Starting school last year threw him into a tailspin indistinguishable from his threenager drama, which didn't subside until he was nearly four and a half, and then I was pretty wrapped up with newborn Heidi for the next few months. By the time we went to the cabin at 4.75, he already seemed very five-ish to me.
And five! It's awesome. He's still small enough to be cute and big enough to be a funny, helpful, caring little person. He really is the life of the household; when he's gone, it's a little too quiet and a little dreary. He's starting to take more notice of other people's moods and needs, not all the time (obviously), but a few occasions from this year stand out. When Karl had surgery early in the year, Henry was an awesome nursemaid, and when I was sick this weekend, he was very sensitive to letting me rest and asking how I was feeling. He also spontaneously thinks of his people and wants to do things for them. Grandpa Dave was the lucky recipient of a neon yellow shirt that Henry saw in a neighbor's give-away pile and saved for two months, just for him.
He adores Heidi and takes great care of her. His new favorite game is to carry her around, which absolutely delights her, but we had to have a talk about not leaving her on the coffee table. He and Ingrid alternately play wonderfully together or antagonize the sh*t out of each other.
He's an extrovert through and through. Carol once told me how she pegged her boys' dispositions: they'd pull the car into the driveway at the end of a family vacation and Eric would immediately leap out and run down the block to find friends; three companions for a week was too few. Karl would immediately go to his room and shut the door; three companions for a week was three too many. Henry goes to class with 25 kids all day, then we play at the playground for an hour and a half after school, and if he can't find any neighbor kids to play with when we get back home, he weeps until Karl gets back to play with him. It's a good thing Karl and I read this or parenting him would be baffling.
He likes novelty but not surprises. It doesn't go well if I try to change the plan or spring something on him at the last minute (a feeling I do understand very well). But he gets bored if we do the same activities over and over again.
He still freaks out about small things but is learning to check it. Ms. Bennett reports that he's even better about it at school because he doesn't want his friends to think he's a baby. All of his buddies are a year older than he is and will move up to the next classroom after this year, which makes me a little nervous about next year.
His ability to focus and work has improved enormously in the last year. He works really hard at karate and parkour, and apparently cranks on the movable alphabet and other work for hours at a time at school.
 |
| Second from left, standing at attention. |
Just in the last two months, he figured out how to follow Lego kit instructions and can do them mostly independently. And it constantly amazes me how many things he can do. He ties his shoes. He opens his own FeverTree ginger beer. Yesterday he made us dessert. It only had three ingredients, but he learned it at a friend's house, he did it all himself without making a mess, and it tasted really good! That's apparently more independence than one can expect from many college students. And yet he still does not eat with a fork on a regular basis. You win some, you lose some.
We had a really fun party at Henry's happy place, the Parkour gym. This was the first time he wanted only his buddies at the party, i.e. not the children of my friends who I make him hang out with. Boooo. But he does have a really nice group of friends from school. I'm also a little touched that he has maintained his affection for Ravi, Cooper, and Wilton since he doesn't see those guys very often any more.
 |
| The buddies: Max, Cooper, Wilton, Hersh, Ravi, and Musa. Absent but worth recording for posterity: Surel, Owen, Aden, Andrew, Khai, and neighbor Sam. |
Of course, these are just my observations of Henry at this age. But he's also getting old enough to have meaningful opinions of his own. As he develops a complex internal life he may see himself differently, and he may change over time and surprise us both. I thought it might be fun to start recording what he thinks of himself and his world right now. So I cribbed some interview questions from another blogger:
- What is your favorite color?
- Green, orange, and yellow
- What is your favorite food?
- Cheese pizza and apples and grapes
- What is your favorite dinner that we cook at home?
- Steak -- or just all of the meats, and kale chips
- What is your favorite treat?
- Milk Duds
- What is your favorite subject in school?
- When I get to come home early or play hooky
- What is your favorite thing to do on weekends?
- Have a lazy day, play video games, go to Parkour on Saturdays
- What is your favorite movie?
- Indiana Jones and Star Wars
- What is your favorite tv show?
- Phineas and Ferb
- What is your favorite book?
- Treasure Island
- What is your favorite song?
- AIAIA [The Galway Girl], and Mr. Golden Sun
- What is your favorite restaurant?
- Pizza and root beer [Seventh Hill]
- What is your favorite vegetable?
- Kale chips
- What is your favorite fruit?
- Apples
- What is your favorite place to visit?
- The cabin
- Where do you WANT to visit some day?
- The pumpkin patch
- Who is your best friend?
- Ravi
- What’s your favorite thing to do with Ingrid?
- Really anything
- What’s your favorite thing to do with Heidi?
- Hug her, carry her
- What’s your favorite thing to do with Dad?
- Play video games
- What’s your favorite thing to do with Mom?
- Hang out
- What do you want to be when you grow up?
- Superman [said with a sly look]
- What is one thing you want to learn how to do?
- I want to learn to be an artist
- What are you really good at?
- Parkour, climbing, and work
- What is something that you wish for?
- I wish that I was Indiana Jones
- What is something you wonder about?
- I wonder if Ravi's next birthday will be a superhero birthday
- Who is someone that you miss?
- I miss seeing Ravi every day
- What makes you sad?
- When you and Dad don't listen to me
- What makes you happy?
- Birthdays
- What would your perfect day be like?
- Building a rocket or finding a mummy or climbing up the Eiffel Tower. . . . [smartass]. Seriously: Watch a movie, go to the pool and practice diving, go to Parkour, play video games with Dad, have a playdate, eat pizza for dinner.
- What age do you look forward to – and why?
- Ten. Because I'll be taller and can do more stuff.
His answers are actually a perfect combination of sincere, funny, and surprising. That's my guy.
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