Four
I've been stalling on this one. I don't like writing an update when the kid is in a difficult phase. Doesn't seem fair to the kid to publicly record their bad days. But I suppose we'll read these again someday and laugh, or at least appreciate how far we've come.
Henry was my "more" child this year. Like any other three year old, only more so. More awesome and more challenging. More affectionate and more combative. More up and more down. When I think about taking him to new places, or working on projects around the house with him, or watching him interact with Ingrid, I think he was just about the coolest kid ever. But also a total "threenager." The drama. THE DRAMA. I'd ask him to eat two bites of broccoli and he'd scream, "WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME!?!?!" Or he'll make a wrong cut on some construction paper and cry and melt to the ground as though someone he loves had been hit by a bus.
So far, four doesn't seem so different. In August and September, it seemed like he was moving past the dramatic phase. He was good-natured and eager most of the time. And then school started, and the outbursts and whining came back with a vengeance.
It's a phase. It's the transition to school. I get that. But it's also our job to help him learn to calm himself down and react reasonably to setbacks. It stinks to feel like we're failing at that for so long.
Still, I'm trying to savor the last year of not-a-real-kid-yet. I see the five year olds at Henry's school, and they're all angles and skinny limbs. Henry still has a little of that delicious toddler softness around his wrists and ankles. Today he was helping Karl sand and paint a doorframe and he looked so sweet, working so hard with his tiny hands. Still nothing more touching than a little guy doing a big guy job.
He is still the sweetest big brother and takes good care of Ingrid. Sometimes she will wander in to his classroom at the end of the school day and Henry will show her where things are and explain how things work. One day I picked him up without Ingrid and he was horrified. His teacher even mentioned at our conference that he was a very doting big brother. He and Ingrid play together very well most of the time and he's usually patient about her messing up his projects. Only once did he look at me and say, with great weariness, "Mom, two little sisters is going to be a LOT of work." I think he'll be up to the task.
He loves being outside, climbing, running, and tackling. He got a new bike for his birthday and is terrifyingly fast. If forced inside, he likes Star Wars, Wild Kratts, and building things. One night this week, he asked to stay up late and build circuits with Karl. He's starting to get into Legos and generally prefers the task-oriented kits to the open-ended generic blocks. He also loves playing video games with Karl. It cracks me up to listen to them bark at each other while defeating Lego storm troopers. At least on the days when Henry is in good form, Karl is thoroughly enjoying having a mini-me.
He is making progress at school. Some of his morning angst has been redirected to whiny behavior in the afternoon, but the dropoffs are getting better. He doesn't like to be late because he doesn't want to miss circle time. And he's clearly learning a lot. Though he says he doesn't do anything all day, he comes home singing new songs, identifying letter sounds, and occasionally dropping references to cylinder blocks and geometric solids. He beams when he gets to show off some new knowledge. At his four-year checkup, one of the developmental checklist items was to have him define some terms. I ask, "What is a ball?" He answers, "A sphere." That's some Montessori awesome. It also cracks me up when he tells his sister, "Ingrid, criss-cross your applesauce!" Or yells at her, without any sense of irony, "Ingrid, we treat our friends with GRACE AND COURTESY!!!" We can't tell if he has made any real friends yet, but it appears that every kid in the school knows his name, and he likes to stay after school to play on the playground.
We had a fun, low-key birthday party at home. This is probably the last year that we can get away with inviting our own friends with kids plus a few of his buddies, putting out some snacks, and calling it a party. By next year he'll have real friends from school and I should plan some party activities for them. Possibly not in my dining room.
This will be another big year for our man. I'm looking forward to seeing how he changes as he settles in to school, welcomes a new sister, and moves out of the preschool phase and into the kid phase. He's a good egg.
Henry was my "more" child this year. Like any other three year old, only more so. More awesome and more challenging. More affectionate and more combative. More up and more down. When I think about taking him to new places, or working on projects around the house with him, or watching him interact with Ingrid, I think he was just about the coolest kid ever. But also a total "threenager." The drama. THE DRAMA. I'd ask him to eat two bites of broccoli and he'd scream, "WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME!?!?!" Or he'll make a wrong cut on some construction paper and cry and melt to the ground as though someone he loves had been hit by a bus.
So far, four doesn't seem so different. In August and September, it seemed like he was moving past the dramatic phase. He was good-natured and eager most of the time. And then school started, and the outbursts and whining came back with a vengeance.
It's a phase. It's the transition to school. I get that. But it's also our job to help him learn to calm himself down and react reasonably to setbacks. It stinks to feel like we're failing at that for so long.
Still, I'm trying to savor the last year of not-a-real-kid-yet. I see the five year olds at Henry's school, and they're all angles and skinny limbs. Henry still has a little of that delicious toddler softness around his wrists and ankles. Today he was helping Karl sand and paint a doorframe and he looked so sweet, working so hard with his tiny hands. Still nothing more touching than a little guy doing a big guy job.
He is still the sweetest big brother and takes good care of Ingrid. Sometimes she will wander in to his classroom at the end of the school day and Henry will show her where things are and explain how things work. One day I picked him up without Ingrid and he was horrified. His teacher even mentioned at our conference that he was a very doting big brother. He and Ingrid play together very well most of the time and he's usually patient about her messing up his projects. Only once did he look at me and say, with great weariness, "Mom, two little sisters is going to be a LOT of work." I think he'll be up to the task.
He loves being outside, climbing, running, and tackling. He got a new bike for his birthday and is terrifyingly fast. If forced inside, he likes Star Wars, Wild Kratts, and building things. One night this week, he asked to stay up late and build circuits with Karl. He's starting to get into Legos and generally prefers the task-oriented kits to the open-ended generic blocks. He also loves playing video games with Karl. It cracks me up to listen to them bark at each other while defeating Lego storm troopers. At least on the days when Henry is in good form, Karl is thoroughly enjoying having a mini-me.
He is making progress at school. Some of his morning angst has been redirected to whiny behavior in the afternoon, but the dropoffs are getting better. He doesn't like to be late because he doesn't want to miss circle time. And he's clearly learning a lot. Though he says he doesn't do anything all day, he comes home singing new songs, identifying letter sounds, and occasionally dropping references to cylinder blocks and geometric solids. He beams when he gets to show off some new knowledge. At his four-year checkup, one of the developmental checklist items was to have him define some terms. I ask, "What is a ball?" He answers, "A sphere." That's some Montessori awesome. It also cracks me up when he tells his sister, "Ingrid, criss-cross your applesauce!" Or yells at her, without any sense of irony, "Ingrid, we treat our friends with GRACE AND COURTESY!!!" We can't tell if he has made any real friends yet, but it appears that every kid in the school knows his name, and he likes to stay after school to play on the playground.
We had a fun, low-key birthday party at home. This is probably the last year that we can get away with inviting our own friends with kids plus a few of his buddies, putting out some snacks, and calling it a party. By next year he'll have real friends from school and I should plan some party activities for them. Possibly not in my dining room.
This will be another big year for our man. I'm looking forward to seeing how he changes as he settles in to school, welcomes a new sister, and moves out of the preschool phase and into the kid phase. He's a good egg.
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